A few weeks ago in a BodyMind class Fabiano was talking about two subjectivities creating intersubjectivity between them and I’ll be honest I couldn’t quite digest his words. They sat uncomfortably in my stomach as my brain was working in overdrive trying to break his words into bite-sized pieces so that I could digest them. This was all because I had decided that I had to understand this statement then and there. But all I was doing was trying to try to understand and that wasn’t getting me anywhere. If anything it was taking me further away fromactually understanding, so I stopped trying and just put the words into my pocket for another time.
That same week I was having a conversation with a friend. There must have been an underlying link between what we were talking about and Fabiano’s class because I had a light bulb moment, while sitting there with a cup of tea, I began to understand the words that I had put into my pocket earlier that week.
We are constantly in and surrounded by relationships with other people. This might sound really obvious but I had never taken into consideration before that I am in a relationship with my body. Throughout our training we are always reminded to listen to our body. But we can flip that and ask our body to listen to us.
A relationship isn’t healthy if only one of the two is allowed to speak and a relationship definitely isn’t healthy if one is always shouting/making demands of the other. But a relationship can have very strong foundations to thrive on if there is communication and listening from both parts of it.
It can be a strange one to initially get your head around. I remember in first year when my shin injury began Fabiano asked me to touch, hold my shins, talk to them and I struggled to understand how that could help. But now, everyday I am in both physical and verbal contact with my shins and finally we are building a trusting, strong relationship.
Let me offer an example to you, I was walking into Northern last Monday and my shins began to be very loud and painful. I reflected on my weekend and I knew that I had looked after them well, massaged them, given them a lot of rest and fed them well. So I stopped walking and started to speak to my shins. I told them that I was acknowledging the noise they were making but I also explained to them that they were safe; I was going to look after them today in class and they had no reason to build up the tension I could feel growing around my lower legs. I listened to my shins and my shins listened to me as by the time I had arrived at Northern the pain had quite literally washed away.
If you have a niggle and push too much in class no wonder your body becomes angry and loud, you’ve ignored it trying to tell you that its not okay. If you do have an injury being angry and negative towards your injury is just the same as standing shouting at someone, is it necessary and is it really the solution to the problem? Just as you would comfort a small child who fell in the park and is scared and upset, it is our responsibly to reassure our body when it needs us.
This was a bit of a ramble so let me leave you with a few sentences that maybe you can put into your pocket:
- Try not trying to try.
- You are in a relationship with your body so honor that relationship.
- Listen to your body but make sure it listens to you too.
- Meet your body, step towards it and it will step towards you.